Our Fat Bodies Are Not Your Metaphors
A look at reactions to Gabourey Sidibe’s engagement reveal a frustrating, persisting reality: when good things happen to fat people, the world doesn’t know how to act.
I once had a conversation on campus with a few fellow graduate students about the upcoming weekend. I, like every other weekend, was going to spend time with my husband and pretend that I was in no way affiliated with an academic entity. One of these students did not know that I am married; they were, in general, unaware of most facts about me, since I’d already gotten the clear hint that they were not very interested in getting to know me.
Their reaction to finding out I was married is still one of the most uncalled for responses I’ve ever received. First, they were stunned and silent. Then, they laughed, hard and uncomfortably. They looked at the others sitting nearby, perhaps for confirmation, and then back at me.
Weeks later, this person saw my husband in his white, straight-sized glory and was, I think, very confused. I believe they were confused because, the next day, they asked me many questions about how we met, how long we’d been together, and the nature of our time spent together. I answered as best as I could, but without them asking what they…
